Maybe you don’t ever really try new things until you absolutely cannot not do so? Or maybe it’s just me? Having another anxiety attack the other day, for the first time I tried, actually really tried, to deal with it through my body (some specific exercises, and some, um, just jumping around and screaming, basically, to build up more energy). And it worked. The negative charge, the anxiety, transformed into a sort of nervous, but not negative, energy (as if I had had too much coffee). It might not be ideal but it is an improvement.

I think I get now (I am sure I don’t yet, but I am at least on the way to get) how this physical part is needed to charge the other parts (the words, the meanings, the spells) with energy. The words alone will not do. And you can’t fake energy. But maybe, at least in theory, I get now how any energy can be rerouted, hijacked (as in détournement), this way. And thus even negative energy – such as fear and anxiety – can be used. And I do have a lot of that.

– J Lundberg


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